Word of advice for any young man that might want to take out Malia or Sasha Obama - Their father can order an assassination, don't piss him off.
When nothing is at stake, everything's a waste.
Word of advice - never ask a terrorist the question 'What would you do for a Klondike bar?'.
Women do not lie about their age. In fact, no woman ever has, its just that memory is the first thing to go.
As we get older, it matters less where you are and more who you're with.
Today I am amused, and I haven't seen anyone yet.
Sometimes, when I'm alone, I wonder if it really counts as being alone, since I am covered in millions of other living organisms.
He said he loved more than any other women he's ever loved and I had a black eye to prove it.
Some days are hard on us. Life gets serious and shit sucks. But you're my favorite distraction, attraction and human being. And, I can't wait to love you more tomorrow.
He's unconventionally attractive and yet coincidentally everything I've ever wanted.
I enjoy self-publishing & sending publishers rejection letters. They're like, 'Who is this guy?' And I'm like, 'the end of your industry.
I surround myself with books when I write, thus surrounding myself with writers... only they don't critique me and then get up for coffee.
I write because it's the only thing I love that always loves me back.
I know I'm not going to be in your head all the time. But once you know me, I'll be forever in your heart.
Never believe the beautiful. Trust me on this.
What good is it if they miss your face but not your mind?
Was I on something? Yes, love. The strongest drug there is.
The smell of new office supplies is so satisfying while being kicked out of Staples for inappropriate behavior with a file folder is so embarrassing.